slimsid2000 Posted April 11, 2007 Share Posted April 11, 2007 Who says they can't? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
willman Posted April 11, 2007 Share Posted April 11, 2007 i can be friends with anyone without expecting or wanting sex. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cressida Posted April 11, 2007 Author Share Posted April 11, 2007 i can be friends with anyone without expecting or wanting sex. well done you, it's taken a long time but what I wanted to hear, Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joanl Posted April 11, 2007 Share Posted April 11, 2007 As I was once married to a serviceman who had lots of service friends, they quite naturally became my friends as well. My father never accepted that there could be platonic relationships between opposite sexes sadly and this caused no end of arguments for me. This was a long time ago now and I am surprised that this attitude still exists. Some of my best mates over the years have been of the opposite sex with no sexual motive whatever from either side.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
willman Posted April 11, 2007 Share Posted April 11, 2007 well done you, it's taken a long time but what I wanted to hear, it's quite easy to have female friends without ever thinking about sex. i do have to admit on occasion with some friends i have wondered what it would be like, i've also rejected some advances 'cos you know things won't be the same after. although now that we don't speak any more i do regret not taking the chance. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cressida Posted April 11, 2007 Author Share Posted April 11, 2007 As I was once married to a serviceman who had lots of service friends, they quite naturally became my friends as well. My father never accepted that there could be platonic relationships between opposite sexes sadly and this caused no end of arguments for me. This was a long time ago now and I am surprised that this attitude still exists. Some of my best mates over the years have been of the opposite sex with no sexual motive whatever from either side.. thanks for that Joan, glad there is someone on my wavelength:thumbsup: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cressida Posted April 11, 2007 Author Share Posted April 11, 2007 it's quite easy to have female friends without ever thinking about sex. i do have to admit on occasion with some friends i have wondered what it would be like, i've also rejected some advances 'cos you know things won't be the same after. although now that we don't speak any more i do regret not taking the chance. how close was it and did she give you any encouragement? If I said to you, look this might be difficult at times but buddies means buddies, I shall not in the slightest make any attempts at flirting in order to seduce you, but just want the closeness and to be there for each other - would that be ok? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
plekhanov Posted April 11, 2007 Share Posted April 11, 2007 Whilst I've known a few guys who couldn't be left alone in a room with a women without making a very clumsy pass at them most guys I know are quite capable of being friends with women without wanting or doing anything to try and initiate sex. I've got a fair few female friends myself and as someone very happy to be in a monogamous relationship far from chasing them for sex have actually rebuffed drunken overtures from a few of them in the past. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
willman Posted April 11, 2007 Share Posted April 11, 2007 how close was it and did she give you any encouragement? If I said to you, look this might be difficult at times but buddies means buddies, I shall not in the slightest make any attempts at flirting in order to seduce you, but just want the closeness and to be there for each other - would that be ok? it happened twice and both were fairly close - one was last year of school and she then went off and married the boy next door. the other was a family friend who did all but stcik it in for me.so you could call that encouragement i s'pose. buddies would be okay with me. when can we start?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lindos Posted April 11, 2007 Share Posted April 11, 2007 just a guess that perhaps the mixed messages you have gotten in the past, may be due to the fact that you may be sending mixed messages yourself, don't ask me why perhaps intuition, but you strike me as a very experienced and persuasive man, and that could be scary to some women, enlighten me:) It's an interesting perception, but not one I recognise. I hope no one who knows me would agree with you, but perhaps I'm wrong.... I have always been attracted to strong women, and have had to be assertive in order to avoid being a complete doormat (not that I avoided it often, but I did try). As for the mixed signals, I thing the lady in question wasn't sure, or was sure and not sure on alternate days...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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