Albert ant lion

[fridgeman]

anyone know where i might obtain the words of an old ditty called "albert ant lion"

[MrH]

Here they are! Isn't Google a wonderful thing?

 

 

The Lion and Albert

 

There's a famous seaside place called Blackpool

That's noted for fresh-air and fun

And Mr. and Mrs. Ramsbottom

Went there with young Albert their son

 

A grand little lad was young Albert

All dressed in his best quite a swell

With a stick with an horses head handle

The finest that Woolworths could sell

 

They didn't think much to the ocean

The waves were all 'spiddlin' and small

There were no wrecks, and nobody drownded

Fact nothing to laugh at at all

 

So seeking for further amusement

They paid and went into the zoo

Where they'd lions and tigers and camels

And old ale and sandwiches too

 

There were one great big lion called Wallace

His nose were all covered with scars

He lay in a somnolent posture

With the side of his face on the bars

 

Now Albert had heard about lions

How they were ferocious and wild

To see Wallace lying so peaceful

Well it didn't seem right to the child

 

So straight way the brave little fella

Not showing a morsel of fear

Took his stick with his horses head handle

And pushed it in Wallace's ear

 

You could see that the lion didn't like it

By giving a kind of a roll

He pulled Albert inside the cage with him

And swallowed the little lad whole

 

Then Pa who had seen the occurrence

And didn't know what to do next

Said, "Mother! Yon lion's ate Albert."

And Mother said, "Well I am vexed."

 

Then Mr. and Mrs. Ramsbottom

Quite rightly when all's said and done

Complained to the animal keeper

That the lion had eaten their son

 

The keeper were quite nice about it

He said, "What a nasty mishap."

"Are you sure that its your boy he's eaten?"

Pa said, "Am I sure, there's his cap."

 

The manager had to be sent for

He came and he said, "Whats to do!"

Pa said, "Yon lion's ate Albert!"

"And him in his Sunday clothes too."

 

Then Mother said, "Right's right young fella."

"I think its a shame and a sin."

"For a lion to go and eat Albert."

"And after we'd paid to come in."

 

The manager wanted no trouble

He took out his purse right away

Saying, "How much to settle the matter?"

And Pa said, "What do you usually pay?"

 

But Mother had turned a bit awkward

When she thought where her Albert had gone

She said, "No! Someone's got to be summonsed

So that was decided upon.

 

Then off they went to the Police Station

In front of the magistrate chap

They told him what happened to Albert

And proved it by showing his cap

 

The magistrate gave his opinion

"That no one was really to blame."

And he said, "That he hoped the Ramsbottoms."

"Would have further sons to their name."

 

At that Mother got proper blazing

"And thank you sir kindly." said she

"What waste all our lives raising children."

"To feed ruddy lions. Not me!"

[JoeP]

Stanley Holloway, I believe....

 

When I was a kid I had a dentist who insisted on reciting this to me during treatment.

 

To this day the saga of Ramsbottom Junior will still raise goosebumps!

 

Joe

[fridgeman]

:clap: thanks alot mr helicopter most amusing,thanks again

[dafodil]

cheers for this my grand child was looking for the words and !HEY PRESTo, here they are on the Forum.

Edited October 14, 2014 by dafodil

[Longcol]

It was one of my Dads favourite pieces. My Aunt read it at his funeral last year.

[wornout53]

This brings back memories of my late mum who used to recite it to me.

[Blackbeard]

Stanley Holloway, I believe....

 

When I was a kid I had a dentist who insisted on reciting this to me during treatment.

 

To this day the saga of Ramsbottom Junior will still raise goosebumps!

 

Joe

 

It was Stanley Holloway who made it famous by reciting the monologues but they were written by Marriott Edgar.

[jfish1936]

In some books of these monologues, there are some not written by Marriot Edgar.

You can tell; the rhythm is wrong, and some words are awkward. Not as good as the old M.E!

[Anna B]

This was my grandad's party piece. Brings back wonderful memories.