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What Are The Most Soulless Towns Or Place In The UK


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Luton in Bedfordshire. I lived there for three years and it is the pits. A place's soul can be partly measured by the number of people being creative adn expressing themselves.

 

Luton has virtually none. I can count on one hand the number of bands that were based in Luton. That is abysmal.

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My vote goes to Telford. It's a glorified shopping centre surrounded by housing estates. Its one advantage is that it's within walking distance of Ironbridge.

 

Oh and Milton Keynes. And Luton.

 

I have to defend Milton Keynes here. When I was younger I used to go raving and Milton Keynes was the rave capital of the UK. In Bletchley in the south of the city used to be an entertainment venue called the Denbeigh Leisure Complex. There was a warehouse called The Sanctuary, a roller skate rink called Rollers and a go-kart arena called the Fastrack.

 

Rave events used to be held in two or three of these arenas with an outdoor complex including fairground rides. There'd be hardcore, drum and bass, techno, old school and hard house. Every couple of months you'd have thousands of ravers from all over the country descend on Milton Keynes for events like Helter Skelter, Slammin Vinyl and Hardcore Heaven. It used to be a magical place.

 

Ask anyone who used to go raving in the 90s (probably in their 20s or 30s now), and Milton Keynes will hold a special place in their hearts. The Denbeigh Leisure Complex closed down in 2004 and I believe there's now an IKEA there instead. :(

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I was going to say Runcorn but then I realised it's so awful that it does have a kind of character of its own (Liverpudlians call people from Runcorn "plastic scousers").

 

For real blandness, something really and utterly non-descript, you'd need to go further south. Hemel Hempstead is somewhere I worked for several weeks without finding a single interesting thing to do or see, or say about it now. Maybe I should mention the roundabouts? It has lots of them. But that's not really very interesting.

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A strong candidate has to be Ashtead in Surrey. When someone told me that residents of a Surrey commuter village were objecting to a house being used to accommodate families of injured servicemen I thought "It has to be Ashtead". And it was: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/news.html?in_article_id=468619&in_page_id=1770&in_page_id=1770&expand=true#StartComments

 

Beautiful houses, nice village, duckpond and everything. But the people who live there are like Dementors. It's full of 'keep off the grass' signs and the kind of people who erect a little white chain link fence around their private parking space by their flat.

 

They had a chippy, but this was not like other chippies - it was a full-on restaurant, marketed as 'Genuine Yorkshire style fish and chips!" I was surprised not to see a plastic whippet tethered outside the door just to add to the no doubt exotic and slightly dangerous atmosphere of this little slice of Northern gastronomy transported to the stockbroker belt. The food was nice but it cost three times as much as a genuine Yorkshire chippie.

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Where to start?

 

Swindon, Derby, Kidderminster, Oldham, Burnley, Aylesbury, Peterborough, Luton, Ashford (Kent), Yate (nr Bristol), Coventry, Rugby are all the pits.

 

Reading is the very definition of 'soulless'.

 

Motherwell, Livingston and Kirkcaldy in Scotland are all pretty dismal, as is Larne in Northern Ireland.

 

But the biggest hellhole in the entire UK by a big margin has to be WREXHAM. It's worth a visit just to see how appalling a town can be.

 

Oiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!

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